Throughout school, you had favorite teachers and you had dreaded teachers. Each student had his or her criteria for what label a teacher received, but some characteristics are pretty standard.

Favorite: fair, easy to talk to, friendly, maybe an "easy" grader, fun

Dreaded: boring, unfair, strict, unapproachable, maybe has bad body odor

These categories are carried with us throughout life. We subconsciously assign them to the people we meet and interact with in business and in personal life.

A friend of mine forwarded me an e-mail she received by a vendor she uses. She wrote to me: "Who in the hell is this chick that sent this letter? This is the most rude letter I have ever received and I don't even owe them any money!"

My friend's take on the tone of this letter was right on. The text was formal, not conversational, and read a little like a lecture. She was essentially being scolded for not following some instructions. The letter was actually written by someone who works at a magazine, and I wondered why her tone missed the mark so significantly. The writer certainly could've gotten her point across in a more fun, approachable way.

For people who don't work at magazines and don't write on a regular basis, I can see how putting together a clear yet friendly piece of business communication would be difficult. My friend's letter was a good reminder of that and of why writers like me are so important to small businesses and nonprofit organizations. Getting the tone of a letter wrong can mean the difference between making a sale and losing a client, between scoring sponsorship dollars and not having enough money to put on an event.

Having a conversation with a client/potential client or sponsor/potential sponsor will make you a "favorite" business or organization. Giving a lecture will almost certainly put you in the "dreaded" category.